It’s easy to mistake the scale of skill for jobs that actually require work when you have never actually worked one.
Can’t catch a break
It’s easy to mistake the scale of skill for jobs that actually require work when you have never actually worked one.
I like doing flaxseed and hot water for baking! Works great in pancakes and banana bread.
So much this. Last time I brought it up, I was asked “what’s the matter, you don’t season your food?”
Uh… There are more seasonings than SALT, yo. You can add more of it, but once it’s in there…
I’m in Kentucky, where you can buy alcohol without a membership. My local Costco has a separate entrance for the booze, no card needed.
Hopefully this isn’t unwanted advice, but I have also cut out a lot of meat from my diet and I started getting weird side effects. (Lost feeling in my hands and feet, got dizzy a lot, felt extra stupid.)
After seeing a doctor, I take vitamin B and D supplements and it helped a lot. If you can’t see a doctor, you might consider trying some vitamin B and seeing if that helps. Apparently lots of vegetarians and vegans take it too.
“I behaved the correct way, and this did not happen to me. If everyone else did the same as me, they wouldn’t suffer. Since their suffering is preventable, they cannot complain and must suck it up.”
“See? I’m on your side. Treat me better than you treat them, please.”
Source: live in a red US state and have talked to a few conservative women and minorities
It is so much bullshit that you get put in that situation for something that isn’t your fault, but glad you had options. It is appalling how we neglect the sick and disabled. My partner was physically messed up for nearly a decade because she could not afford the healthcare or the time off needed. (Fortunately she is doing much better now after I could support her financially to get treated.) In a time of great abundance, this should not be a common occurrence.
I hope you find answers and relief soon.
You are so very right. However, these facts do not deter these managers. (And other people that think like this.)
The culture I grew up with valued this type of thing.
Why did you miss work? A cold? If you’re not in the hospital and you’re not here, you are a slacker.
It doesn’t help when you don’t have any more paid sick time and you need to keep paying the rent.
It’s so infuriating that it feels like life is structured in such a way that it is difficult or impossible to recover from these types of things without exposing people to your own sickness.
No excuses for people that are sick don’t stay home when they have the opportunity though.
ETA: masking does definitely help though and I’m glad the culture doesn’t find it as unusual as before
How fulfilled is your life without a romantic partner? Do you know what you want?
The worst partners I had were the ones that had nothing going on. No goals, no hobbies, nothing. They expected me to be their world.
The better relationships I had were with people that knew what they wanted from life. They didn’t need me to complete them, but I was definitely a welcome addition.
I do not believe I am conventionally attractive, but there are people that like me. For every fella that only dates skinny blondes, there’s another that wouldn’t give them a second look. Additionally, if someone really likes you for you, you might just get more physically attractive to them even if you’re not their type. (It has happened to me!)
As for money, yes some people will only look at you if you have a lot of money. At least they filter themselves out if you don’t have it. You don’t have to be perfect with money, but as long as you are reasonable enough with money, you should be fine.
Some low self-esteem is workable, but if you are always ragging on yourself it gets grating. I was with this guy and he kept telling me how ugly he was. I would always reassure him. It was exhausting after a while. I think everyone needs validation every now and again, but constantly?! Ahhh!
If you get this stuff down, at least then you will have better chances with women. (Or whatever gender you prefer.) If your only goal is to get a girlfriend, then that is not so great. If it’s only one of your goals or something you’re passively open to, then you are in a much better position. Relationship opportunities, romantic or not, seem to crop up when you’re doing something else you enjoy.
With your back to the water, barbecue. Messy as hell. But that doesn’t matter cause you’re in the shower.
Time to fight the cacademons.
What would have made you feel better? My guess is that you would have been happy if the other person wasn’t upset with what you said and didn’t disagree with you, right? Do you think if you were able to explain yourself, then the other person would have understood you and not disagreed with you?
It’s likely that would have not been the case. There is a very good chance that they still would have disagreed with you even after elaboration. And you know what? It’s not your fault.
You will have a large set of views about different facets of life. Even if they were all the most sane, rational views, many people will disagree with them. (And in different combinations. You may have Andy agree with you on X, Y, and Z but disagree on Q, R, and S. Brad may think you’re right with X, R, and S but disagree on the rest.)
It is inevitable. So, what is someone to do?
First, is it something that matters? If it’s something like an opinion of which celebrity has the best smile, remind yourself it doesn’t matter.
But if it’s something that does matter? Make sure you educate yourself. Accept evidence to the contrary to what you believe (from reliable sources). Keep an open mind. Accept input. Be aware of your own bias. If you need to update your own viewpoint because you found out you were wrong… Then do it! Yes, it sucks that you were wrong. But it’s better to have been wrong then correct yourself than to stay wrong. This is important… If you’re wrong, act the way you would want the other person to act if they were wrong. (You will make the world a better place doing this.)
Now, does this person still not agree with you (and you updated your own viewpoint based on facts)? Can you change their mind? Probably not. Is this a failing on your part? No. You can’t control other people, just like they can’t control you. But you can control yourself.
Being told we’re wrong sucks. But if you do not have sufficient evidence that you are wrong, then you should be confident in what you think. Instead of framing this scenario as “this person disagrees with me,” frame it as “I disagree with this person.” With time and practice, you will more easily move to “I disagree with this person, and I am ok with it.”
One last note. If it’s something that is very important to you, make sure to do what you can to make the change you want to see in the world. If you were very concerned about pollution for instance, do things like trash tag, buying less stuff, and advocating for your cause. This specific person may not help, but you can still live your life as a reflection of your own values to the best of your ability and maybe even collaborate with others as well.
I hope this helps.
My friend is from a smallish town (~4k) and they don’t like Mexican food much, either. (And the southern US cuisine is also something they are “meh” on.) Not a whole lot of restaurant food they like around their neck of the woods.
Oh lordy when they come visit me in the city, they chow down on what we got. It’s always fun to have them help me order something I’ve never tried; I’m not nearly as adventurous when they’re not around. (I usually experiment in the kitchen or order something familiar when I go out.)
I wish I knew that three years ago. I had a Perkins loan with Heartland ECSI. At the beginning of COVID, they kept screwing up how much I owed them. I would log in a few days before payment should have been due, and it said I owed them $0. So I thought this loan was on the same thing my Stafford loans were on, where I owed no payment temporarily due to COVID.
I log in a few days later then it says I owe my normal payment + late fee and it says I am overdue. I call their customer service and I explain the situation. The lady seemed to not believe me. “No, it says you owe X amount. I would not have said 0.” Given that I caught this fast enough, if I paid it now it wouldn’t have affected my credit. I just paid the payment plus the small fee because I did not have the energy to fight due to dealing with the world’s crisis and my own added problems at home.
The next month, I see that it says I owe nothing again. Well, maybe they finally got the student loan pause stuff figured out. Nope, same thing. Not knowing if I was just going nuts, and factoring in my intense burnout, I just paid off the whole thing. Fortunately it was not much, but enough that my savings for a down payment was wiped out. I really could have used that money but for a finance company to just screw up so badly on a simple thing I just did not want anything to do with them any more.
No. These are printed plastic advertisements delivered via the postal service. (Other companies might purchase small mini catalogs/coupon books, colorful envelopes, or eye-catching postcards for their mail-based advertisements.) These mailers are sent to many people. Most people refer to these mailers as “junk mail.”
Spectrum is very bad about sending lots of these, as OP has shared.
The fat, jolly, red-suit-wearing Santa as we know it today, created by Coca-Cola to sell more product, is a Marxist. TIL. 😂
I used to be homeless. (I am doing significantly better now though. Hard work and luck.)
I did actually have a job, it just didn’t pay enough to get me a place to live at the time. I was too ashamed to beg for money, but I did occasionally hang around restaurants and ask people for food. (So much shame because I had so many peers with family that helped them and they would look down on me for “failing to launch.”)
Why didn’t I go to a food bank? Because the bus system sucked and I couldn’t get everywhere I needed in the amount of time I had in the day. Additionally, I had no kitchen. No place to prepare food that isn’t ready made. The shelter did not allow me to store food.
Government help and charities were definitely not enough, but it did help. A lot of people in charity were good people, but there were quite a few that were just plain nasty. At the shelter, I would get yelled at for following their rules and asking for my phone that they held at the front desk so I could get to my job for instance.
It does not feel good when your family lets you down, your community lets you down, the government lets you down, and even the people that are supposed to fill in the gaps lets you down. Really makes you think that you are undeserving.
You are right that some homeless people have a hard time finding a job. A lot of places will discriminate against you if you do not have a permanent address (and some will even look for addresses of shelters). If you went to jail, a lot of places won’t consider hiring you. And if course wages are just really low compared to cost of living.
Yes, it is ok to feel bad for those people that don’t have what you have. That is human. Yes, some of them may have made some bad choices and some of them might not need the help. But a lot of those people are just victims of an uncaring system. If you do not help them (which is fine, it is not always possible), at least treat them with dignity. Being treated like a worthy person, rather than a second class citizen, means a lot to someone who society let down.
It blows my mind when people do that.
“Hey, the way that you styled yourself makes me not want to have sex with you.”
“Uhhh… Cool?”